Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Last minute links, when animals attack, and general silliness

Rapidly running out of time before heading to Texas, so I may not finish the big FAQ post before I go. Or the Asus review. Or whatever the other post was. I know, I'm useless. In my defence, I am also in the midst of a massive bout of the Space Virus, so I'm not quite in my right mind. This has been dragging on for a couple of weeks now, threatening to arrive, and now it's in full flow. So I'm desperately hoping it'll be on the way out tomorrow, as flying with blocked sinuses literally makes your head explode.

For now, here's a link to an interview in the latest issue of UK Writer, the magazine of the Writers' Guild of Great Britain - it's about writing for Doctor Who, and features Paul Cornell, Rob Shearman, and an extremely handsome, talented writer called-- oh, how staggeringly unexpected and embarrassing! It's me!

I'm a bit late mentioning it, but didn't want to let it go without saying anything: Sadly, Gregory MacDonald recently died, an author I've admired for years. He's best known for the Fletch series of books which, if you haven't read any, you must get hold of immediately. The first Fletch movie is quite good fun, but the books are light years better. Reading the first one is like getting a masterclass in writing great dialogue. It's fun, but hard as nails, has a clever, twisty-turny plot, and will instantly become one of your favourite books as soon as you finish it. Pick up a copy, and revel in some sparkling, rock solid writing. Trust Uncle Jimbo, now.

And on a lighter note, here's a reminder of what happens when you fuck around with wildlife. Apparently, they bite even harder if you are relentlessly cheerful at them. Oh, and if anyone can find a clip online of when Nigel Marven got bitten on the nose by a tiny, bright green snake, I will be your best friend forever, or at least for 10 minutes. It is absolutely hilarious, even better than the above link. I'm a sucker for videos of people getting smacked upside the head by animals. Leave them alone. If some idiot decides to jump the fence at the tiger enclosure at a zoo, don't bother rescuing him. He'll learn a valuable lesson, if he survives, and the tigers will fucking love it - live prey! That's *all* they are thinking when they see you staring at them in zoos: (a) how do I get out of here so I can eat that guy's head, or (b) I hope that guy jumps or falls in, so I can eat his head.

Oh okay, just because I'm in that sort of mood, and hepped up on goofballs, Benylin, and Nurofen, here's another silly video. Now, I am of the opinion that the Jeremy Brett version of Sherlock Holmes is the definitive portrayal. The Granada series is superb, I have the box set of the entire series, including the feature length ones, and it's just fantastic. However, you can always improve on a classic, with the simple addition of pasty white blokes rapping. This just makes me fall about in hysterics, and for several days this has been the funniest thing in the world for me. Sorry, but I'm very childish.

Okay, going to try and finish one proper blog post (the FAQ or the Anus review) before I go. If I don't manage it, then keep the internet clean and tidy while I'm away, don't talk to any strange men, and put some pants on, for God's sake. If you're in the Texas vicinity, come and say hello, and marvel at the drunken, meat-crazed spectacle I'll probably be making of myself.


Danny Stack said...

Have a good 'un in Texas!

Dim said...

Right, if you're ill it can be your fault...I mentioned my stack of "How to..." books on your blog comments the other day, and now I need my Michael Hague screenplay book so I can see how to write a phone conversation in a screenplay, it's gone. Must be your fault. You have flu. Clearly this is intergalactic karma. Plus you're going off to Texas to enjoy yourself while the country slides into the toilet of financial ruin. How irresponsible can one man be? (That is not a challenge. Please behave with dignity and decorum whilst among the colonials.)

Anonymous said...

Lol have fun in Texas, hope you feel better! Hmm, it seems a bug has ben going al round the country, because msot of my college has had sore throats/ coughs/colds. I had all three yesterday and barely made it to college D: So I know how you feel!!

I don't know about a bright green snake, but here is that guy getting knawed at by another snake. There is blood pouring down his arm and he STILL goes on and on about how "beautiful" it is!!! And he wont pull it off because it could "damage the snake's teeth"
the guy's mad!

Have fun! Get well soon!
Love Charl :) xx

Dozeymagz said...

You'd better not mention your malaise to airport authorities or you may be considered a threat to National Security - I've heard they don't really like people with exploding heads going on planes, even if they happen to be massively talented and witty writer chaps. Apparently it takes ages to clear up all the BBC Green gunky mess and puts the cabin crew in a right grumpy mood for the whole flight.
So - get better soon and have a great time in Texas!

Anonymous said...

No green snake biting Nigel Marven on the nose, but a brown snake biting Nigel Marven on the hand, will that suffice?

BaaBaaDoodle said...

James -

You back home yet? Had fun?

What do you think of RTD's book?

There are internet discussions raging all over re rewrites and tinkering with Doctor Who scripts on RTD's part. Can't wait for your input :).

Dom Carver said...

You've been tagged, read my blog :-P

James Moran said...

Charlotte: Thanks for that, that's a good one - glad he was more worried about the snake than his hand...

BaaBaa: Back home, jetlagged, had great fun, now I am exhausted and slightly injured (see next blog post...) I love the book, haven't read the finished version yet, but read much of an earlier version - I think anyone who wants to be a writer should read it, will post more on it later. What are the raging discussions? I thought it was common knowledge that he rewrites?

Dom: I'm 3 tags behind already, I'll add it to the queue. Should be ready by 2015.

Iona said...

That's the last time i go to a zoo...XD