Wednesday, May 06, 2009

I HAVE NO IDEA WHEN TORCHWOOD S3 WILL BE SHOWING ON TV

I DO NOT KNOW.

THEY HAVE NOT TOLD ME.

THEY HAVE NOT TOLD ANYONE, SO IF THEY TOLD ME I WOULD NOT BE ALLOWED TO TELL ANYONE. IF I DID, THEY WOULD HAVE ME STRIPPED, SHAVED, OILED, AND THROWN TO THE WEEVILS.

BUT THEY HAVE NOT TOLD ME.

I DO NOT KNOW.

I HAVE SAID THAT I DO NOT KNOW, BOTH ON HERE, AND ON TWITTER, MANY, MANY TIMES.

PLEASE. PLEASE. FOR THE SAKE OF MY SANITY. STOP. ASKING. THAT. QUESTION.

Kthxbye

34 comments:

Nicole said...

Just make sure it's oiled and not BBQ sauce cause then Myfanwy might get a hold of you.

Dave said...

So, when's it on then?

the_who_ru said...

I believe in true Internet form, that sign-off is spelt: kthxbi.

Dftba.
~~Verity

BenPaddon said...

Holly, are you trying to tell me everybody's dead?

Cunningham said...

Oh you so know.

James Moran said...

Nicole: And you don't want to see Myfanwy eating. Or trying to mate with a broken umbrella.

Verity: Didn't know that, but I'll leave it there as a sign of my disturbed state.

Dave: Monday.

Cunningham: I am sharpening my meat-hammer, and am on my way to destroy you.

Dan said...

June 15th. I thought everyone knew. :)

Tracey said...

Why would you mate with a broken umbrella? Sounds uncomfortable. Trying to mate with a functioning umbrella probably isn't any better. In fact, it could be worse.

clarrisani said...

It will be on when its on. And what happens in the story/finale will be revealed then. Until then, I shall quietly content myself with sitting back and watching certain fan groups gouge each others eyes out for daring to suggest a date/rumour they disagree with, which pouncing on any and all suggestions of the date/finale rumours.

Fandom never ceases to amuse/frustrate me.

Anonymous said...

I would love to have people obsessed with my work so I say pull yourself together and stop screaming.

I have to go anon for this.

Nicole said...

James: Myfanwy eating might be scary. And how would a pterodactyl mate with an umbrella anyway?

Scratch that, I not sure I want to know.

James Moran said...

Anon: I am *delighted* that people are that interested in my work. But I've answered this question so often - it's on my blog, it's on my Twitter, it's *easily* available to see, it's probably quicker to find it than to send me a message asking it. Anyone will confirm for you that I love the fans and love answering questions, any questions. But imagine, if someone kept asking you a question over and over again, every day, every single day, constantly, for *months*, a question you had answered in public and all over the web - a question you didn't actually know the answer to - and after getting asked it three times in a row - and answering - you get asked again, almost immediately, *on the same place you've just answered it* - wouldn't you think to yourself, sheesh, if they'd just looked a few inches down on the page before posting their question, they wouldn't have needed to ask? Wouldn't you get just a *bit* frustrated??

I love you ALL, and am not angry or anything, no need to go anonymous - but saying the same thing over and over was starting to drive me mental. It was the "do you know who the new Doctor is" all over again...

Jodie said...

Anonymous: you *have* to go anon for this? really.

The "screaming", assuming you're talking about the all caps, is clearly done in a lighthearted way, and just because James has a fantastic job doesn't mean he must never ever get irked in the slightest by anything to do with it.

Get down off your high horse, go into the saloon, have a drink, and lighten up.

Joseph Lidster said...

Okay, so you don't know. But do you know when there's going to be a new series of Howards' Way?! We've been waiting too long!

Gizensha said...

Hang on, do you know something we don't know about Weevil mating habits?

Cunningham said...

He tells the truth. I've seen him answering fan questions...

It isn't pretty. Not one bit.

Re: Meat hammer. Bring it.

(But pack a lunch. It's an all day job)

blearyboy said...

This is a bit like The Thick Of It special when everyone's waiting for the PM to announce his resignation date. Except TTOI had less swearing, obviously.

Jason Arnopp said...

Tell us when it's on, you bastard! You're. Hiding. The. Information.

Mary Hoffman said...

On the Contact Page of my website it says to read the FAQs if your query is about a film of the books or more books in the series. It also says please not to ask me when translations come out in different countries but to contact the publishers because I don't have this information.

Guess which are the three most common topics I find in my mailbox?

I share your frustration. And I shan't ask anything about Torchwood but I sure shall enjoy it when it's back.

Dom Carver said...

There's a new series of Torchwood???? No one told me, when 's that... on second thoughts I'll just wait until they announce it.

Anonymous said...

Thanks, James. We love you too. I just read it as angry.

And I went anonymous for the exact reason of Jodie's reposnse.

Jodie said...

Anonymous: if you can't put your name to what you're posting then you should think twice about posting it. You were wrong, your comment was unpleasant - and I called you on it, politely. Simple as that, no reason to hide behind anonymity.

James Moran said...

Anon: Don't make Jodie the villain, you're not being attacked, she responded very briefly and perfectly nicely. Your comment implied that I shouldn't get annoyed at the question, as I'm lucky people like my work. You also told me to calm down and "stop screaming". Your tone was patronising and presumptuous - you can't then complain when that's pointed out to you, and say "ah, you see, *this* is why I'm anonymous, I *knew* I'd be attacked, oh the injustice"...

Dozeymagz said...

Pipes some nice calming music into the blog....

"Now everyone - breathe in - breathe out... you are an orange, floating down a river of Peacocks....you are calm - peaceful - *subliminal message - BE PATIENT!!! HE DOESN'T KNOW THE DATE! MR MORAN HASN'T YET BEEN SUMMONED TO THE INNER SANCTUM OF THE BBC SCHEDULES! DO NOT ASK HIM THE DATE OF TRANSMISSION - end of subliminal message* Calm - peace - see the lillies float by..."

Anonymous said...

Sorry.

I knew what I was saying was confrontational, but I wasn't having a go. Just found it hard to stomach.

My fault. RIP Anonymous.

P.S. Apologies Jodie.

Jodie said...

Anonymous: Gorgeous of you to apologise graciously, thank you. James absolutely adores his work, and knows how fortunate he is to be doing it - I'll be the first to remind him if he forgets!

chuck said...

It seems I am the only one here that can figure out that James has already told us when it starts.

Just look at what he wrote, all caps, staggard, shouting, saying here I am you fool can you see it? Not one profanity. Why?

James first moive, Severance has exactly 9 letters in it name. Torchwood has exactly 9 letters, Doctor Who has eactly 9 letters. The Doctor's dog's last name is 9 (k-9)

The first two sentences has exactly 9 words, which is his code telling us an important follows. If you add those 9 words to the next bunch you get 42 words total. 42!!! The answer to life the universe and everything follows.

The next number of words is 6, which must stand for the month in which TW starts(He thinks like an American) The next number is 4, the date of the first episode. The next number 17 is the date his episode airs, both fall on a Thursday. And fianlly, the last number ties it all together, 12 closes the message. 12, an extreamly important number.
The number twelve plays a significant role in Battlestar Galactica. The characters come from the Twelve Colonies of Kobol and worship the twelve lords of Kobol. In the re-imagined series, there are also twelve models of the humanoid version of Cylons.

Twelve is a composite number, the smallest number with exactly six divisors, its proper divisors being 1, 2, 3, 4, and 6. And everyone knows 6 is is way hot.

Twelve is also a highly composite number, the next one being 24 another television reference.

WHY CAN"T EVERYONE SEE THIS FOR WHAT IT IS!!!!!

Nina said...

Please forgive if this has already been asked. Can you tell us this Oh TORCHWOOD Oracle...When it does finally air, will the episodes each be a full hour in length, meaning on BBCA us bastard step children across the pond will actually only get to see thirty-seven minutes of your brilliant storytelling, entwined in twenty-three minutes of Pepto Bismol commercials?

Gizensha said...

...I'd have thought they'd have just stuck an extra 7 minutes of commercials in there and called it a 1:30 show if it's an hour...

Antonia said...

Do you know who the new Doctor is? Mwah.

James Moran said...

Anon: Well said, very graciously - I tip my hat to you.

Chuck: You have deciphered the code. For this, you must die. Sorry. You're a victim of your own success. Please report to the Incineration Wing.

Nina: Yep, they're a full hour. I'm hoping BBCA won't be cutting them to ribbons, but I don't know - check with them and make sure they know that you'd rather watch the whole episodes, and not three quarters of them...

Gizensha: That'd make sense to me, but then I'm just a writer, what do I know? Nothing, that's what.

Antonia: Yes. It's me.

funnyerik9 said...

That's fine! We didn't want to know when it was on anyway! (*reverse psychology*reverse psychology*)

-Erik

Chris Page said...

Now if only you could find a way for Abby to step through an anomaly and end up in Cardiff...bwahahahahaha!

Steve B said...

Probably old news and posted elsewhere on your blog, James, but during the series premiere of PRIMEVAL, BBA ran a promo stating that TORCHWOOD would be coming in July.

SB